UniSelf

Woops I Did It Again

Wake Up And Smell The Civet

I went shopping on Saturday. I don’t like shopping but I had no choice as my 13 year old daughter was with me. Enough said. We went to the clebrated Selfridges store in the BullRing, in Birmingham City centre. Never was the term “more money than sense" more appropriate to describe the kind of people who buy the items on display here. Having said that, it’s a fascinating place to window-shop and see some of the most bizarre, esoteric products I’ve ever seen for sale. But maybe I’ve led a sheltered life. It’s a far cry from the old BullRing, that’s for sure.
Here are just a few of the items you can find at the "iconic" Selfridges…

£25.00 for a bottle of water...are you INSANE???

And leaving the best 'til last...Civet coffee. The civet is a mongoose-like creature native to the Phillipines which likes to eat the finest berries from the local coffee plants. The beans undergo a process of fermentation in the civet's gut before being excreted by the animal. The reconstituted beans are then separated from the fecal matter and processed into a coffee which is supposed to taste sublime and then sold onto wealthy westerners at a price of around $115 a kilogram.

This packet retails for around £20.00.

No Shit...

No Trick, No Treat

PUBLIC APOLOGY

I start my blog in penitent mood. Last night a group of youngsters got the sharp edge of my tongue when they knocked on my door to “trick or treat” me last night. They caught me at a bad time and I told them in no uncertain terms to “clear off”…or words to that effect. The youngsters skulked away without saying a word. Afterwards I thought, you miserable bastard. You used to do that when you were their age. A couple of minutes later I went looking for them to see where they had got to and to give them some chocolate by means of an apology. But it was too late, they had already gone. I felt like the Grinch at Christmas. The kids are probably making effigies of me now to burn on Guy Fawkes night. The next time some youngsters called I gave them a packet of chocolate bars. But I still felt guilty as hell.
Sorry kids…